[StubbornPatriot]

Customer: "Waiter, this coffee tastes like mud."

Waiter: "But Sir, it was fresh ground, this morning."

[SteveB]

Customer: "Waiter - you've got your thumb in my soup!"

Waiter: "Don't worry sir, it's not hot".

[SteveB]

Customer: "Waiter, there's a fly in my butter!"

Waiter: "That's not possible sir - we only serve margarine".

[ReubenVP]

Why can't cows wear shoes?

They lack toes.

[Johnny 216GSi]

I've just bought a bottle of Fred Flinstone aftershave.

It's got a very strong smell and you don't need to use much.

A little dab'll do.

[Johnny 216GSi]

How many Motown jokes do I know?

Three, maybe four tops.

[ReubenVP]

A person died after falling into a giant vat of coffee.

Their partner told reporters, "they didn't suffer, it was instant'.

[ReubenVP]

I asked my Boss for a raise because three companies are after me.

They said "Which ones?"

I replied, "Gas, Water and Electric."

[ReubenVP]

To eat a whole cake would be to commit the sin of gluttony.


But to eat a whole pie is ok, as the sin of pi is zero.

[ReubenVP]

Have you heard of a new sport called 'quiet' tennis?

It's like normal tennis without the racket.